Confession ng isang Bob Ong Fan

 

 

Hindi ko pala kayang hindi magsulat. Ngayon lang marahil ako muling nagpost sa blog kong ‘to. Medyo naging abala kasi ako sa nobelang CONFESSION NG ISANG BOB ONG FAN. May mabuting balita ako sa inyong lahat. Ililimbag ngayong taon ng Flipside ang librong ito. Hindi ko rin ito inasahan. Sa totoo lang, parang isang panaginip lang ang lahat.

Nakilala ko ang publisher sa isang All-Filipino Book Festival noong Setyembre 2013. Nagustuhan nila ang ideya ko sa The Write Pitch. Naaalala ko pa. Sabi nila sa akin, “Napasaya mo ang tanghali namin.” Noong una nga ay nahihiya pa akong magsalita. Tapos, biglang may publisher na nagsabi na “Parang speed dating lang ‘to kaya bilisan mo.” Tatlong publishers ang naroroon nang araw na iyon. Ang Visprint Enterprises, Lampara at Flipside. Nangangalahati pa lang ako ng pitch ay binigyan na agad ako ng calling card ni Miss Katz ng Flipside. Pagkatapos kong magsalita, inabutan din ako ng Lampara ng calling card.

Pero si Miss Katz ang unang nag-email sa akin. Dapat talaga (at yun naman talaga ang alam ko) ako ang mag-e-email. Kaya nga nagbigay sila ng calling cards dahil interesado sila. Ang nangyari talaga, biglang nag-email sa akin si Miss Katz kung gusto ko daw ipabasa ang nobela ko.

Ilang taon nang nakabinbin sa laptop ko ang CONFESSION NG ISANG BOB ONG FAN ngunit di ko pa rin ito pinakikita sa iba. Nahihiya kasi ako. Tingin ko, ako lang matatawa sa sariling biro. Ilang buwan din bago ko nakumbinsi ang sarili na ipabasa ang akda.

Ang una talagang pamagat nito ay CONFESSION NG ISANG WRITER O KUNG SINO BA TALAGA SI BOB ONG. Pinasa ko ito noong 2012 sa Visprint pero mukhang di sila interesado. 

Sabi pala sa akin ng Visprint noong Write Pitch, baka daw isiping promo material lang ang gawa ko kung tatanggapin nila ito. Sila kasi ang publisher ni Bob Ong. Ayos lang naman sa akin ‘to. Nauunawaan ko naman sila. Pero sabi naman nila, gugustuhin nila itong basahin pag nalimbag na ito sa tamang panahon. Di ko lang alam na ito na pala ang tamang panahon na matagal ko nang pinakahihintay.

Nagpirmahan kami ng kontrata ng Flipside noong ika-14 ng Marso 2014. Araw ng Pi. Di ko akalaing mapalad pala talaga ang araw na ito para sa akin. Kinausap din ako ng in-house illustrator na si Trizha. Sabi kasi ni Miss Katz, mas maganda raw kung lalagyan ng illustrations/infographics para mas ma-appreciate ng mga mambabasa ang kuwento. Pumayag naman ako. 

Kahapon naman pinakita na sa akin ni Trizha ang book cover pati ang mga illustrations para sa CONFESSION NG ISANG BOB ONG FAN. Na-impress talaga ako sa gawa niya. Super-galing!

Ngayon, excited na ako para sa publication ng CONFESSION NG ISANG BOB ONG FAN. Hinihintay pa pala namin ng Flipside ang permiso ni Bob Ong at ng publisher niya para sa nobela ko. Sana pumayag sila.

 

Shakespril’s Sonnet

words under vertigo

Bipolar

Hello

Let my hello catch you once more
A checkmate in our conversations
The blades of grass as high as the fence
Not yet mowed.

The river be a river
Envious of the pearls in your chest
The ones I gifted you
When we were riding a horse
The river weeping alone
Whispers a spring tune
To hide my hello

I know you listen to my hellos
Even if you are asleep
Dreaming of drowning from a river
Of obvious oblivion.

If my hello could salvage you
From the nightmares of maidenhood
Let my finger draw a hello
In the mirror on your bathroom

 

 

First published in The Manila Times

http://manilatimes.net/poems-by-by-april-mae-m-berza/65086/

If words could touch you

If words could touch you
Let them caress you like a long lost lover
Weary from battle, the war of raw,
An encounter with the inevitable

If words could touch you
Let the syllables play within the core
As the troubadours take part in
The more solitude be tolerable
Be with the words
Words whose cradle within
Returns to the primitive.

If words could touch you
Let them be but do not
Every word is an enemy of action
Every action a friend to none.

 

 

First published in The Manila Times

http://manilatimes.net/poems-by-by-april-mae-m-berza/65086/

Mornings and Shadows

When mornings are veiled with sadness
I ask that you whisper no song
Sell my tears in the hardware
Donate my blood to the crickets
Just leave the door of our bedroom
Slightly open where I could hear
The sun’s footsteps like a burglar
And remember not to water
The sunflowers on my windowpane
Just leave me alone with your shadow.

When sadness are veiled with mornings
Drop a hello to a marionette
Listen to the bleeding Stradivarius
As one would hear a sermon
Then walk with a living saint
In our living room and dance
Sculpt me a rainy season soon
The sawdust rippling in my bath tub
And I will forget the mornings
Forget that mornings have no shadows.

First published in The Siren

http://thesiren.co.uk/Article.aspx?ID=23

Pablo Neruda Syndrome

I invited Neruda to my
Ward but he refused
That night, I cried
He was resolute
I stole the fountain pen
Of a night-shift nurse
To write an entry
To my journal
Trying to steal
Neruda’s attention

When the nurse
Caught me, Neruda
Felt guilty and he
Opened the windows

If only I could run
Away with him but
I am tied, tired
Of eloping.

Anxiety is my shadow
I swallow a sparrow
There is a lump
On my throat

My journal is bleeding
I asked for the doctor
But he told me
I am just dreaming

 

First published in Luciferous

http://luciferouszine.blogspot.com/2014/01/pablo-neruda-syndrome-by-april-mae-m.html